Legalize Marajuana Drugs Social Issues us Law Justice Jon Stewart Colbert

Top Ten Reasons to Legalize Marijuana.

In our lifetimes, it is likely that cigarette smoking, once touted by doctors and television commercials, will become increasingly socially stigmatized.  It may even be made illegal, because like alcohol, it has been proved to kill in many ways.

Also in our lifetimes, it is likely that marijuana will be legalized.  It only became illegal due to racism against Mexicans, and cool jazz artists, and the need for political reformers to have a case.  Most people now realize that cannabis has practical, even humanitarian applications.  Conservatives will most likely demonize the stuff in the same way they deny that “good” kids are inspired by abstinence.

I have a personal top ten list of reasons to legalize marijuana.  By the way, I can’t stand the stuff.  I hate how it destroyed my family. I think it should be firmly regulated.  And, I believe that Plan 9 from Outer Space is a better movie than Half Baked with Jon Stewart.

Reason number ten: Environment.  People should use hemp, a renewable resource, to make paper, clothing, bio-fuels, soap, and products that haven’t even been thought of yet.  Going through forests like there is no tomorrow is stupid, and may lead to no tomorrow, especially for bear cubs, (even Stephen Colbert who is cute, thinks cubs are cute) Bambi, and spotted owls.

Reason number nine: Medicine. Medicinal marijuana has proved to be an effective pain killer. My mother died of a broken back.  She was much too independent to take her prescribed pain meds, had a lifetime of being stronger than pain, and was of a resilient generation that endured everything from the Great Depression to The Holocaust, and the Cold War.  Maybe a bit of pot, if it was socially acceptable, could have mellowed her out and relieved some pain.

Reason number eight: Spiritual enlightenment and freedom of religion.  I don’t get it, but there are people who feel this stuff is sacred. It’s obvious that things like chocolate are sacred, so maybe it’s not so far-fetched.  People should have the freedom, perhaps, if not to happiness, but at least to the pursuit of happiness, and maybe to the oblivion of stress.

Reason number seven: Prohibition is a failed experiment. Turning teens toward alcohol instead of pot is like handing a child with a toy gun at school a handful of razors, and saying, play with these instead, it’s legal and you won’t be expelled.

Reason number six:  I forget reason number seven because marijuana affects memory and I tried some as a teen.  No, I’m kidding, I just don’t have a reason number six, or maybe I forgot.

Reason number five: The cost.  The insane cost of violent gang violence and turf wars over pot have destroyed many lives. There were those disgusting Mexican drug thugs who murdered my nephew for instance. The cost of our prison industry too, creates some jobs, but aren’t there more important things for the justice system to do, like locking up violent murderers, rapists, corrupt CEO’s, bankers, and gangsters? 

Reason number four: Marijuana has endured the test of time.  It’s one of those things that has prevailed in many cultures, and over many centuries.  It has not been as destructive as most drugs, or as dangerous as most of the toxins in plastic, chemicals in your food and clothes, furniture, and cosmetics, or as threatening to the planet as most things we burn, like coal, gas, oil, or garbage.

Reason number three: The economy.  Regulating marijuana could start up a lot of new businesses.  It is already happening, and has revitalized several cities, and even countries, where its use is legal.

Reason number two: People who need pot should not be demonized, and politicians need to grow up and not be wusses when it comes to standing up and doing the right thing.  Given the full list of uses and reasons for decriminalization, it seems absurd to keep pouring money into all those noise polluting helicopters and to have to wage a war on the war on drugs.  The war on drugs has failed, except as an incarceration industry. Just say NO, Nancy, no.

Reason number one:  This one doesn’t affect you at all, but it does affect my whole neighborhood.  Our neighbors sell pot and the traffic to their house is ridiculous.  They have a shrieking, annoying gate for “security”, and seven or eight unfortunate tortured guard dogs that live on chains 24/7. The barking, the traffic, the dust, the suffering is useless. When marijuana is legalized my neighbors will likely be put out of business by a big Pharmaceutical corporation.  I hope the dogs go to good homes and we will finally get a good night’s sleep around here. Oh yeah, I also read marijuana helps you sleep, but I’ll wait for legalization instead.